Last night I nursed Audrey for the very last time. As I rocked her in her dark room, the tears streamed down my face. I thought back over the incredible journey of the past thirteen months. I thought through all of the worry and anxiety that came during the beginning. I cannot begin to count how many times I asked myself whether she was getting enough milk, whether she was gaining weight, whether my supply was down, and on and on and on. I remembered the phone calls to the lactation specialists and other nursing moms, begging for advice and guidance. I remembered the pump and the pump parts and the cleaning of the pump parts. I remembered being desperate to quit. Then I remembered how that dislike turned to tolerance...then like...then love.
In my mind, I pictured every place I'd fed her: the hospital, the homes of friends and family, my childhood bedroom, and, of course, the car. That child has been fed in the parking lots of malls, gas stations, restaurants, stores, and churches all over this state. I also thought through all of the ways I spent those hundreds of hours. In the beginning (when she'd make harmonica sounds while she was eating), I read to her and talked to her, trying everything to keep her awake. As we both got more proficient, I was able to multi-task a little better. I've checked emails, made phone calls, cooked meals, and eaten meals while simultaneously feeding her. Of course, there was a lot of staring and hair stroking and praying over her. Those are the moments I will always cherish.
One of the things I will miss the most is the quiet closeness we were able to steal together every day. No matter what was going on, I knew that at certain times, she and I would sit down and be able to catch our breath and cling to each other for a little while. It was just us and no one else mattered. In those moments, I was her world and she was mine. It was nutrition and comfort only I could provide.
As I laid her in her crib last night, I was filled with a mix of pride, sadness, and happiness. We'd made it through literally thousands of nursing sessions. It was one of the hardest things I've ever accomplished in my life, and certainly the hardest that I've ever had to do for that long. I'm heartbroken it's over, but I know it was time. Though the physical pain, sacrifice, and commitment that came with it cannot be fully explained unless you've been there yourself, it was worth it. Totally, completely, worth it. Congratulations, Baby Girl. We made it.
Showing posts with label Nursing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nursing. Show all posts
Nursing Must-Haves
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
*Warning: In case the title didn't give it away, this post does contain information about breastfeeding. I would recommend that you stop here unless you are a soon-to-be or new mom!*
I am amazed and shamelessly proud of myself that I have breastfed Audrey for almost eight months. For most of that time, I was her sole source of nutrition and, even though we've started solids, I am still her main provider of calories and will be for several more months. (Don't worry, I'm not going to become a news story, though. The AAP recommends breastfeeding for one year and then "as long as mother and baby would like after that." I plan to comply with the one year.)
In case you are a new reader or have forgotten, let me remind you that this road has not been without its bumps. Okay, that's a bit of an understatement. Let me reword that: It's one of the most difficult things I've ever done in my life. Ever. For me, it requires more sacrifice and commitment than the entire nine months of pregnancy did. And I'm not even a working mom who has to pump!
Now I'm no expert, but I have come across a few great products and tips that I'd like to pass on. Along with a lot of prayer and a little silent cursing, this stuff has helped me tremendously:
1. Take a class. I'm so thankful we did. (Yes, I dragged David along and I highly recommend it for your husband too. He needs to learn and understand so he can be supportive!) Most hospitals offer a one hour course at a reasonable price or you can check with your local Babies R Us. Even if you already know it all and don't learn a thing, you will at the very least become more comfortable with the concept.
2. Invest in a good pump. They are expensive, but worth every penny. Even if you aren't going to go back to work, you will at some point want to leave your baby for longer than 3 hours or have a need to pump and store milk for mixing cereal, sippy cups, etc. I use my Medela Pump n' Style daily and have been very pleased with it.
3. Have a plan for cleaning all those pump parts! I use the Medela Quick Clean Bags. They're a lot easier and faster than the big sterilizers. Each bag can be used up to 20 times, so they're more cost-effective than they first appear. They are also good for bottles and pacifiers.
4. Buy a good nursing pillow. I have a My Brest Friend and love it. I take it everywhere and rarely nurse without it. It offers more support than a Boppy. In fact, I used to be able to stand while nursing if I tightened it enough (she weighs too much now), which allowed me to do some serious multi-tasking. In addition to that, you may also want to...
5. Find a good nursing wrap. My favorites are Udder Covers. Every once in awhile they'll run a special where you get the wrap for free and just pay shipping (approx. $8.) Whatever brand or style you choose, it's a great thing for nursing in public, at a friend's house, or even in the back seat of your (parked) car.
6. Have the number of a lactation specialist to call on. Most hospitals and/or pediatrician's offices offer this service for free. I have phoned mine several times over the past few months for everything from finding out what cold medicines were safe for me to take to tips on starting solids. Just remember to be careful taking any advice about overfeeding or underfeeding. Unless she sees you nursing, knows your baby, and tracks her weight, that's a hard thing to diagnose over the phone.
7. Consider keeping Fenugreek handy. I think I've mentioned this stuff before, but it's worth repeating. Fenugreek is an herb that helps stimulate and increase milk production. If you have good reason to believe your supply is low (you should check with a lactation specialist first), it's a great home remedy. Most drugstore chains don't carry it, so try GNC or Vitamin Shoppe. Be forewarned that your sweat and urine will smell like maple syrup. But, there are worse things to smell like in the world!
8. Buy some nipple cream (before the baby comes...and pack it in your hospital bag!) My personal favorite is Earth Mama Angel Baby nipple butter. It's organic and all natural. Trust me, you will need it (and a stick to bite down on) for the first few weeks.
9. Build up a resource library of books and websites you can pull from when you have questions. Kellymom.com is one website I use a lot and I know my lactation specialist uses it too so that gave it some validity in my mind. I also borrowed my sister-in-law's The Ultimate Book of Breastfeeding Answers. I don't know if it was the ultimate, but it was indeed thorough.
10. Purchase some milk storage bags. It's hard to imagine having excess milk in the beginning, but you may eventually need to freeze some so that it keeps longer. I use Lansinoh brand, which are supposedly the thickest on the market and therefore protect better against freezer burn.
11. Get fitted for a couple of nursing bras. The good ones are expensive, but it's so important to have something that is really high quality and durable. Considering what you're putting those girls through, the least you can do is treat them to a little support.
12. Don't be afraid to reach out to other nursing moms. There will be times that you think you must be the only one in the world having a particular problem. There will be times when you loathe breastfeeding while simultaneously thinking that giving it up will cause your heart to shatter. All of this is normal and it helps to talk to other women who have been through it. They can listen, offer advice, and remind you of things you already know. As I recently read somewhere, there is no limit to how much information two women - even strangers - will share with each other if they are both lactating. Strange, but true.
Above all, remember that you're doing an amazing thing! Whatever time you can stick with it is wonderful and will benefit both you and your baby. Hang in there and happy nursing!
I am amazed and shamelessly proud of myself that I have breastfed Audrey for almost eight months. For most of that time, I was her sole source of nutrition and, even though we've started solids, I am still her main provider of calories and will be for several more months. (Don't worry, I'm not going to become a news story, though. The AAP recommends breastfeeding for one year and then "as long as mother and baby would like after that." I plan to comply with the one year.)
In case you are a new reader or have forgotten, let me remind you that this road has not been without its bumps. Okay, that's a bit of an understatement. Let me reword that: It's one of the most difficult things I've ever done in my life. Ever. For me, it requires more sacrifice and commitment than the entire nine months of pregnancy did. And I'm not even a working mom who has to pump!
Now I'm no expert, but I have come across a few great products and tips that I'd like to pass on. Along with a lot of prayer and a little silent cursing, this stuff has helped me tremendously:
1. Take a class. I'm so thankful we did. (Yes, I dragged David along and I highly recommend it for your husband too. He needs to learn and understand so he can be supportive!) Most hospitals offer a one hour course at a reasonable price or you can check with your local Babies R Us. Even if you already know it all and don't learn a thing, you will at the very least become more comfortable with the concept.
2. Invest in a good pump. They are expensive, but worth every penny. Even if you aren't going to go back to work, you will at some point want to leave your baby for longer than 3 hours or have a need to pump and store milk for mixing cereal, sippy cups, etc. I use my Medela Pump n' Style daily and have been very pleased with it.
3. Have a plan for cleaning all those pump parts! I use the Medela Quick Clean Bags. They're a lot easier and faster than the big sterilizers. Each bag can be used up to 20 times, so they're more cost-effective than they first appear. They are also good for bottles and pacifiers.
4. Buy a good nursing pillow. I have a My Brest Friend and love it. I take it everywhere and rarely nurse without it. It offers more support than a Boppy. In fact, I used to be able to stand while nursing if I tightened it enough (she weighs too much now), which allowed me to do some serious multi-tasking. In addition to that, you may also want to...
5. Find a good nursing wrap. My favorites are Udder Covers. Every once in awhile they'll run a special where you get the wrap for free and just pay shipping (approx. $8.) Whatever brand or style you choose, it's a great thing for nursing in public, at a friend's house, or even in the back seat of your (parked) car.
6. Have the number of a lactation specialist to call on. Most hospitals and/or pediatrician's offices offer this service for free. I have phoned mine several times over the past few months for everything from finding out what cold medicines were safe for me to take to tips on starting solids. Just remember to be careful taking any advice about overfeeding or underfeeding. Unless she sees you nursing, knows your baby, and tracks her weight, that's a hard thing to diagnose over the phone.
7. Consider keeping Fenugreek handy. I think I've mentioned this stuff before, but it's worth repeating. Fenugreek is an herb that helps stimulate and increase milk production. If you have good reason to believe your supply is low (you should check with a lactation specialist first), it's a great home remedy. Most drugstore chains don't carry it, so try GNC or Vitamin Shoppe. Be forewarned that your sweat and urine will smell like maple syrup. But, there are worse things to smell like in the world!
8. Buy some nipple cream (before the baby comes...and pack it in your hospital bag!) My personal favorite is Earth Mama Angel Baby nipple butter. It's organic and all natural. Trust me, you will need it (and a stick to bite down on) for the first few weeks.
9. Build up a resource library of books and websites you can pull from when you have questions. Kellymom.com is one website I use a lot and I know my lactation specialist uses it too so that gave it some validity in my mind. I also borrowed my sister-in-law's The Ultimate Book of Breastfeeding Answers. I don't know if it was the ultimate, but it was indeed thorough.
10. Purchase some milk storage bags. It's hard to imagine having excess milk in the beginning, but you may eventually need to freeze some so that it keeps longer. I use Lansinoh brand, which are supposedly the thickest on the market and therefore protect better against freezer burn.
11. Get fitted for a couple of nursing bras. The good ones are expensive, but it's so important to have something that is really high quality and durable. Considering what you're putting those girls through, the least you can do is treat them to a little support.
12. Don't be afraid to reach out to other nursing moms. There will be times that you think you must be the only one in the world having a particular problem. There will be times when you loathe breastfeeding while simultaneously thinking that giving it up will cause your heart to shatter. All of this is normal and it helps to talk to other women who have been through it. They can listen, offer advice, and remind you of things you already know. As I recently read somewhere, there is no limit to how much information two women - even strangers - will share with each other if they are both lactating. Strange, but true.
Above all, remember that you're doing an amazing thing! Whatever time you can stick with it is wonderful and will benefit both you and your baby. Hang in there and happy nursing!
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