My word last year was "Faithful" and it really did help me to call it to mind when I felt like I'd dropped the ball or was lacking in motivation. It also reminded me of how faithful God is even when I don't see His hand in a situation.
So my word of the year for 2018 is....(are you making the drumroll sound?)
Enough.
Yup. Enough.
There are so many reasons behind this choice. For one, it reminds me not to face my days with a sense of scarcity. I often roll out of bed already worried about how I'm going to get it all done. This word reminds me that I have enough time, energy, and talent to accomplish the most important things I have been called to do. Not the superfluous, but certainly those that are the highest priority. Another reason for this choice is to remind me to be careful in my choices of adding more to my life. Do I need more stuff in my house or commitments on my calendar? In most every situation, the answer is "you have enough."
But the biggest meaning behind it is that I am enough in God's eyes.
Back when I was doing the Timber Trek, a well-meaning person that I barely knew turned to me and asked incredulously, "This is amazing. Why aren't you doing more?!" She meant it as a high compliment...that I was so organized and managed things so well that I could and should be setting my sights higher than a neighborhood charity race. But her words hurt my heart so badly. Here I was working my fingers to the bone to pull together a race while also serving nonstop at the kids' school and parenting solo since David was in the midst of a busy travel season. And yet, in her eyes (which, again, she had no clue of any other detail of my life), I could do more...bigger, better things.
What she didn't know is that I have an innate disease to achieve. I am constantly making and ticking off to-do lists, setting goals and working towards them. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it can go too far. I have never, ever understood people who say they are "bored" and my default is always to do, rarely to rest. When that equates to taking on too much and constant striving, it's unhealthy. It's unfair to me and to my family. So this year, I'm going to remember that I do enough. That I am enough. Of course I'm going to continue to set goals and work hard and hopefully accomplish some very worthy things. But I will remember that even if I never lifted another finger, I would be enough. To my God, to my family, and to my close friends who love me well.
I came across this sign online and an immediate lump formed in my throat. I bought it and it is hanging in my laundry room for me to see at the end of each night:
I want so desperately to one day hear God speak the words, "This is my beloved (daughter), in whom I am well pleased" just as He did to His son Jesus.
But do you know the most interesting part to me about that verse? God spoke those words to Jesus before his ministry even began. Before Jesus had performed His first miracle or healed anyone, He said He was pleased with Him. He was enough because He was His son.
We say the same to Audrey and Luke a lot. We explain that there are many things that we like about them, but that we love them for the sole reason that they are our children. Period. They don't have to earn it at all. They can never do anything to make us love them more and they can never do anything to make us love them less. Simply by existing, they are enough.
So this year I hope to rest in that Truth for myself a little more.
I have enough (time, energy, talent, stuff, commitments), I do enough (when I do the right things well), and I am enough (to God and those who love me.)
What's your WOTY for 2018?
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