Growth Spurts and Teething

I think I mentioned something about these things before, but I've decided they need an entire post to themselves. It just might save me from clocking somebody.

If I hear "Oh, she has started teething" or "She must be going through a growth spurt" one more time, I think I'm going to scream. EVERYTHING that has been slightly off about this child has been explained away by one of those two diagnoses, usually by someone who has never spent more than five minutes with our daughter.

Sure, both are valid explanations some of the time. Of course she is growing like crazy...she is a baby, after all. It's what they do. As far as the teething thing, I know they can start exhibiting symptoms months before a tooth appears, so yeah, she could be feeling the effects now. But neither one can be the case all the time! My sister-in-law explained that my niece's growth spurts are nowhere around when the books say they should be. Is she an early developer? Or is she late? Was her gestational period off? People can drive you crazy worrying about those dadgum growth spurts.

So when does it end?! I can just see it: Audrey will be playing soccer one day and get kicked in the shin. Black and blue, she'll come to me crying and I'll say "It's okay! Just walk it off. It's only a growth spurt." She'll walk in the door from a particularly bad day in high school and I'll say, "Oh honey. Don't worry about it. You're just teething." Bad grade on a math test? Growth spurt. Fight with a friend? Teething. Got a speeding ticket? Growth spurt AND teething.

I must admit, I've often used both as excuses for her odd behavior. But I'm allowed - I'm the mommy. I spend every minute of every day with her, so I'm more likely to actually know when it's a valid answer. Sometimes, though, she may wake up at night because she is cold. Or has her arm stuck outside the crib. If she eats more frequently one day, I don't automatically assume it's because she is in a growth spurt. There are some days that I am more hungry than others and I'm pretty sure I'm done growing (vertically, at least.) And she puts her hand in her mouth for everything. She has done it since she was in the womb - she came out with suck marks on her fingers, for pete's sake. It does not necessarily mean she is teething or hungry. She just loves to suck on her hand! It's comforting to her!

So, not to offend you if you've offered up these explanations to us before. We're just super tired of hearing them. Of course, as I said, sometimes they're right on the money. Other times they're way off. Who knows. It's become such a joke in our house that David and I can hardly look at each other when we hear someone say it. We're so immature. Or maybe we're just teething.