On May 16th as I picked her up from her last day of school, I almost cried. I remember staring blankly at the vastness of summer before us as I wondered how I would survive three and a half (hot!) months of two children at home. Sure, she had only been going eight hours a week. But that was eight hours a week we both thoroughly enjoyed.
Today I pulled away from Audrey's preschool and had to forcibly steer the wheel to make myself leave the parking lot. It wasn't emotional the same way it was last year. I wasn't worried about her or desperate to know how she was going to fill her day, at least not to the same degree. It was more of a quiet realization that this growing up thing - yeah, it's happening. And that I had just survived the longest consecutive break I'll ever have with her. Ever. Next year she'll start kindergarten in August, so her summer will be much shorter.
That makes me really, really sad. Except it also doesn't.
This blog sums it up incredibly well: http://putdowntheurinalcake.com/2013/09/im-ecstatic-schools-starting-except-when-im-not/
So since someone else already put into words how I feel about all of this school business, I'll save the rest of the post for putting into words a few things I liked about this summer in the form of a note to my big Pre-K student:
Dear Audrey,
You started Pre-K today. You looked so adorable in your pink ruffle-tier dress and black mary janes. Your running nose bothered you a bit, but no way were we going to let some sniffles stand in the way of this most wonderful of days! (Sorry, classmates.)
When we walked through the doors, the teachers were having their morning meeting and prayer circle just down the hall. We waited with the other parents and kids for them to finish and usher us in. You kept pulling my hand and inching us closer toward your room. "Are they finished YET, Mommy?" you asked impatiently. I told you no as I took another picture.
Finally, an entire five minutes later, the meeting ended and it was off to the races. You nearly jogged us both down the hall to your class. The first one in, you shyly put away your lunchbox and looked around the familiar room. The teachers were new, half of the students would be new to you, but the room itself was the same. As a fellow creature of habit, I imagine that gave you some comfort.
You chose a coloring page and opened the box of brand new Crayola crayons. Ahhh - that smell. Is there anything nicer than a box of fresh crayons? As you colored, I smiled at other moms, dads, and kids walking in and let my mind wander.
We kind of rocked this summer, didn't we? I mean, last week I began having this haunting feeling that we didn't soak it up as well as we should have, but when I look back, I realize we did pretty darn good.
You took ballet and looked so precious in your pink leotard and sheer skirt. You did a week of swim lessons at our neighborhood pool and, though it was no Coach Kara experience, you fearlessly tackled those too. We started reading and handwriting lessons with Mommy (almost) every day when Luke would go down for nap. Amazingly, we got through 70 out of 100 of them; you are becoming an incredible little reader! We hit the beach with family, the fountains with friends, and the park with playmates. You had the most adorable Tea Party birthday party a four year old could ever ask for. You saw your first movie in a theater, drank your first milkshake, went on your first crab hunt, and ate your first ice cream cone. You stopped sucking your thumb. We visited family and said goodbye to dear, sweet friends who moved away. We saw the aquarium. We saw a magic show. We saw your pediatrician and an ophthalmologist. You splashed in the wade pool in the front yard and strolled down the sidewalks on after-dinner walks. We shopped, played, and picnicked our way through the lazy days, what few of them there were.
Yeah, we did alright.
What's most amazing to me about all that we did and experienced these past few months, though, is you. How you handled each new thing with the perfect balance of bravery and grace. Oh sure, you gave me some trouble. You're getting a little more argumentative in your old age. There were also a few instances (per day) that you'd get upset at Luke for having an opinion or playing with the very thing you decided you had to have at that moment (the nerve!) But overall, occasional four year old tendencies aside, I witnessed quite a bit of maturity blossom in you this summer and I liked it. I am SO proud of you.
Just like I knew you could handle your Daddy and I being gone for five days, I know you can handle Pre-K. You'll step up, figure it out, and help others along the way. You're brilliant and capable, Audrey. God made you that way. Don't let anyone ever tell you any differently.
Go get 'em, Sugar.
I love you,
Mommy
xoxoxo
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